Ask Valorie: Are other people naturally more motivated or am I just plain lazy?
Date: Tuesday, November 27, 2007
By: Valorie Burton
Q:
Dear Valorie,
I really want to lose weight, but I just cannot seem to get disciplined about eating and exercising. I tell myself I’m going to get up early and go to gym, but I just hit the snooze button and drift back off to sleep. Then I’ll say I’m going to work out after work, but then I’m tired. I just can’t seem to get going. One of my best friends finally started working out several months ago and has lost 20 pounds. I’m jealous! Why can’t I get motivated like her? She says she finally got tired of complaining about her weight and decided to do something about it. Are some people naturally more motivated than others? Or am I just lazy?
A:
Motivation comes from within, and you must find a reason that is compelling enough to pull you forward. It sounds like your friend got tired of her own excuses and felt compelled to finally change. Now, it’s time for you to let go of your excuses! Rationalizing that others are “naturally” motivated is just an excuse for not doing what you need to do. In fact, if you re-read your message, you’ll see it’s filled with excuses – “But I hit the snooze button,” “But I’m tired,” and so forth. Be honest with yourself. You are not at your best. You are not taking care of the body you’ve been blessed with. You can do better. It won’t be easy, but you can change. Nothing will change unless you make new and intentional choices (read this month’s column on being intentional). What would compel you to make a change? Some people are compelled to live longer, look better or feel better. Others are compelled to be their best or practice discipline. The key is to take a step forward, then another. You don’t have to give up everything at once or work out for an hour every single day. Start small, but start now! This week, make it your new rule not to eat after 8 pm. Next week, add a brisk walk three times a week. The following week, start drinking four glass of water and half as much soda or coffee. One step at a time, you’ll begin seeing the change you want – and you’ll feel good about the discipline you’ve developed!
Valorie Burton is a professional certified coach and author of several books, including How Did I Get So Busy? (Broadway Doubleday, $12.95) due out December 18th. Subscribe to her free, weekly e-newsletter at www.valorieburton.com.
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