Q: I was recently let go from a temporary assignment that was stressing me out big time because of my crazy supervisor. She always told me that I was doing a fantastic job, but when I followed her instructions to the letter, she would tell me that I was doing a bad job and was incompetent. Things were getting progressively worse every day and she let me go last Friday. Before she called me to tell me that I was being let go, I noticed her shoes under my desk. Her and her other assistant had been trying for a while to get my password and finally got it somehow. They proceeded to go through all of my deleted emails and now four days later, since I've been gone, she's emailed people that I emailed to tell them that she's not crazy and that I'm the one who's crazy. She wanted to let them know that she is a professional and that I am not because I used company time to send emails. One of the people to receive am email from her was my mother, who is a drama addicted alcoholic and called me adding more stress to the situation.
I didn't want to ruin my relationship with the employment agency, with whom I've been in constant contact about this boss. But since she's emailing people about me and harassing me, I decided to call her boss to inform him of what's going on. The former boss is a public relations person, so she spins information for a living and she's trying to do this now. Her assistant even admitted that she (the assistant) was trying to sabotage me too. These were two black women that I thought I could learn from and have a positive work experience with and this happens. I'm feeling discouraged and stressed right now and I don't know what else to do. I just wanted to get a job, pay my bills and get my own place again. Now I feel stuck. What should I do?
A: My jaw dropped when I read that your boss emailed your friends and even your mother. Unprofessional does not begin to describe how unacceptable that was. If there is one thing you can learn from this, it's to keep personal emails on your personal computer and not one owned by someone else (i.e., your employer or anyone else you don't want trying to access and read your personal messages). While an employer can, in fact, read your emails, she has clearly violated a boundary by reading your messages and then emailing your friends and family.
Nonetheless, it's over. She is no longer your boss and you've got to move on so that you can reach your goal of getting back on your feet. Don't even continue to stir up the drama by discussing it anymore. Let go of it by focusing on your job search.
The loss of a job can also be a time to reflect and determine if there is something new or different you would like to do. Aim for a job that is what you really want rather than haphazardly ending up with a job that you don't like. And this time when you go for interviews, remember that it isn't just the potential employer that should be doing the interviewing. Ask questions of them too, and use your intuition as the sixth sense that helps you make the best decision about who to work for.
Stay focused on your goal. You'll be back on your feet in no time!
Warm wishes,
Valorie
