LeAnna M. Washington is busy at work these days like many of her colleagues in the state senate, looking to push through Pennsylvania’s budget, finally freeing needed dollars to strapped social service agencies that aid the most vulnerable.
Washington once was among them.

Well before she was called “senator,” looking to right wrongs, she was called “Cookie,” looking for love. When she was 18, she figured she found it.She became a married woman, with a black eye as a honeymoon present from her new groom – the first of many.

“It was the big secret,” Washington told BlackAmericaWeb.com. “But women being beaten was not unfamiliar to me. And I got used to being beaten.”

As have many black women across the country.

While the sensational incident between pop stars Rihanna and Chris Brown recently snagged headlines and electrified airwaves, the struggle against domestic violence among African-Americans is an age-old and often silent battle. Those fighting to end it hope the spotlight from Domestic Violence Awareness Month will draw recruits.

It’s not just about donning purple ribbons or playing celebrity public service announcements. It’s about absorbing the reality that close to five in every 1,000 black women aged 12 and up are victims of domestic violence, according to the U.S. Department of Justice. It’s understanding that among those abused aged 15 to 34, murder by a husband or boyfriend remains a leading cause of death.

More importantly, it’s about actively working on changing those outcomes, said Dr. Oliver J. Williams, executive director of the Institute on Domestic Violence in the African-American Community.

“We have to figure out ways for our communities to own it,” Williams said. “We have to devise ways to get communities to see what actions and activities they can do to be engaged and involved, to develop solutions to it.”

First observed in October 1987, Domestic Violence Awareness Month evolved from a single day of unity to a month-long endeavor to spotlight a social condition that was considered taboo for polite conversation.

Verbal, sexual and physical abuse are forms familiar to a large swath of black females. Historically so, Williams said. These are the scars of slavery, lack of education, discrimination, unemployment and other frustrations that have been exacerbated among African-Americans.

Poverty tends to be an indicator for abuse, though violence is not confined to one social class. The difference is having options and resources to escape – options not always afforded by those struggling to survive day-to-day. Feeling trapped leads many women to stay put - and in peril.

For Washington, those days seem like a lifetime ago, but the memories still make her cringe.

Like when she and her young children would barricade themselves inside a bedroom, dresser against the door, and remain huddled together until they heard her husband's truck pull away in the morning.

Or the time she tried to exact revenge after a beating by tossing a pot of boiling water at him, and instead he dumped the hot water on her.

Or the day he unexpectedly stepped in puppy feces, dragged her to the spot, twisted her arm and shoved her face in the smelly mess.

But the beatings were the constant, followed by the apologies, the promises to change. Until the next beating.

“A lot of people ask me to come and share my story,” Washington said. “The toughest woman will stop and pay attention, and that’s because it’s not just unique to me. We all know this story, but just with different players.

“Sometimes I laugh when I hear myself repeating the stories, asking myself, ‘Why did I take that?’ But it was real life. And it happens all the time.”

And cycles continue, through generations. Boys .....

Please Login or Register to post comments on this article

Close Comment  |   Read More Comments Hide More Comments

Comments * :

Please do not enter the HTML tags(Maximum 600 characters).

What about Muslim women?

by   
MikeCockrell9
October 4, 2009, 2:02 pm
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Black Women Bear Brundt of All bad in USA, that's why First Lady necessary, too much bad, too sad for Black Women in USA today. Better only if some of stimulus money gets in their hands, at this time, money in same hands as before recession. Herein lies problem, no funds, no respect: no education, no housing, no future, no talents, no funds, no computers, no jobs, no songs, no stories, no country, no one else does it better, so we're going no where without her brundt butt burnt.bye bye birdie baby got back.

by   
Writertracy
October 4, 2009, 2:46 am
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

USAGirls need to be getting an Ed as teens; married,1st step 2 abuse.Hookingup prevalent lust models,pays girls if man has money,DV is sad for all. Steamy passionate emptyheaded relations w/out funds worse;break cycle& reduce DV. Rape rise, if women avoid relationships before working on self.Better position, he'll have to catch you first. Women coming from other cultures brought US back 100 years.They don't know what they're doing&our men don't know what they're doing w/them.Chris Brown from _&Rihanna from Barbadoes.Cultural clashes occur, this fight was bad, at home&abroad.

by   
Writertracy
October 4, 2009, 2:42 am
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Parenting isn't difficult, most love their children. Economics is difficult, with a decent education, a place to live. Corporate interests brought our legislatures, instead of giving jobs. States, cities, counties, protecting the people were replaced with republican and democrat, industry & economics since politics pays well. Women bearing defenseless little human in arms is when both are really vulnerable. Teaching youth instead of psychologically training them improves condition of women getting butts kicked by men. Having shelter improves human condition for all involved.

by   
Writertracy
October 4, 2009, 12:36 am
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Player it doesn't work out well in America because so many don't intentionally want it to. Lock up the men, and don't give the women jobs, dumb down schools, and send a film crew in to see what the unattended children are doing, as a means of entertainment to ...anyboy who will watch. Nurturing for emotional growth, nature for human body &education for mind, and space to live, stimulates economies & made USA the envy of the world, which is why humans converged in every nook & cranny could. We didn't know what hit US, and can't recover. Checkmate. Now what?

by   
Writertracy
October 4, 2009, 12:24 am
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Wow we figured out black men are crazy and over sexed....jeez who would have guessed. We just haven't figured out we are the past...dragged out of Africa and dropped into another world...and it doesn't work out to well....here we go again the human brain needs to grow naturally and evolve and well black men in America have no chance of that happeneing...it was like we were taken from mars and dropped on planet earth...no amount of education will work....it is what it is...the brain takes thousands of yrs to change and adapt...we ain't got that kind of time...no happy ending...

by   
Player
October 2, 2009, 5:06 pm
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

We must grow from simply having OPINIONS on serious issues like this to doing independent research, obtaining factual information, and gleaning a real education. You know the saying: “Opinions are like @$$holes, everybody’s got one”. In our culture, not only has everybody GOT an opinion, they want their opinion to be respected no matter how wrong, ignorant, or uninformed it is. We never really grow to where we need to be to overcome issues like this because we get trapped in our own philosophy (philas = love and sophy = to know; philosophy = to love what you know).

by   
Drwill911
October 2, 2009, 3:07 pm
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I work to reeducate men who have entered the justice system for crimes related to domestic violence and authored a book “How To Avoid Bad Relationships” (drwill911.com) that teaches women how to identify the profile of an abusive man, their common habits and characteristics, as well as why they choose the women they are attracted to. It is a no nonsense primer for women to share to obtain knowledge on men who are likely to abuse in order to protect themselves, their sisters, and their girlfriends. Men can use it too in order to learn what not to do.

by   
Drwill911
October 2, 2009, 3:05 pm
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Black women as a group also under report rape. I cannot tell you how many of my former students who are well-educated with law degrees who've told me that they have been sexually mishandled. Their reasoning for not reporting ? Did not want to place a black man in jail, especially a black man in high position and esteem. It is a terrible cycle. We must address in forum with many great minds to help us get out of this mess.....craziness.

by   
Jazflutesmith
October 2, 2009, 12:17 pm
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I am back, whew.. had duty. I will close by saying this, (I never close). We have to address these issues and address them as separate components, then address the larger issue of Domestic violence: Birth Control, The UNrole of the black church, Child Support, Education, BIRTH CONTROL 2 (abortion), Welfare system, what they should STOP paying. Employment and Training. Love of self. Marrying outside your race, I am in favor of that 100 percent.

by   
Jazflutesmith
October 2, 2009, 12:11 pm
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Love you too Jazz!

by   
Brightwood1
October 2, 2009, 11:39 am
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

As I said we have to start educating ourselves as a community and purpose to raise a generation that has more respect and that understands that self-persevation is dependent upon this simple concept.

by   
Brightwood1
October 2, 2009, 11:38 am
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Black people need a good overhauling. We need to go back to basics: Education, training, love of the Creator, NO MEGA CHURCHES< NO PIMP PREACHERS, Marriage before children. long courtships. BIRTH CONTROL, BIRTH CONTROL< BIRTH CONTROL< BIRTH CONTROL. If we did these things that I mentioned, we would be fine.
I am just soooooo smart. lololol
whoops, have duty..bye
love you Brightwood, you know that
bye

by   
Jazflutesmith
October 2, 2009, 11:36 am
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

And...

by   
Brightwood1
October 2, 2009, 11:34 am
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

We must grow from simply having OPINIONS on serious issues like this to doing independent research, obtaining factual information, and gleaning a real education. You know the saying: “Opinions are like @$$holes, everybody’s got one”. In our culture, not only has everybody GOT an opinion, they want their opinion to be respected no matter how wrong, ignorant, or uninformed it is. We never really grow to where we need to be to overcome issues like this because we get trapped in our own philosophy (philas = love and sophy = to know; philosophy = to love what you know).

by   
Drwill911
October 2, 2009, 11:34 am
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I work to reeducate men who have entered the justice system for crimes related to domestic violence and authored a book “How To Avoid Bad Relationships” (drwill911.com) that teaches women how to identify the profile of an abusive man, their common habits and characteristics, as well as why they choose the women they are attracted to. It is a no nonsense primer for women to share to obtain knowledge on men who are likely to abuse in order to protect themselves, their sisters, and their girlfriends. Men can use it too in order to learn what not to do.

by   
Drwill911
October 2, 2009, 11:33 am
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

.. I just walk away from them crazy people females and males, they are nutts. They have needs that I cannot meet.

by   
Jazflutesmith
October 2, 2009, 11:32 am
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

hold up, that is true Brightwood, but as a group we only make up 11 percent of the population BUT make up 40 percent of foster care rolls...HELLO??

by   
Jazflutesmith
October 2, 2009, 11:30 am
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

No one can make you do ANYTHNG! If battery is in you and a part pf your life then that is how you behave!

by   
Brightwood1
October 2, 2009, 11:29 am
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

...okay I may be a little overboard, but dang. I see the children at school and their parents and come to this OPINION and not a fact. They are just nutts.

by   
Jazflutesmith
October 2, 2009, 11:28 am
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

child neglect is even more prevalent among whites. White women have entertained being abused so that they could maintain a certain lifestyle. Black men abuse their women because they were taught this how to subdue and control women...they were beat so they had to have an outlet and used their women for that. It is a vicious cycle and it needs to be addressed.

by   
Brightwood1
October 2, 2009, 11:27 am
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I know it is difficult to find a good black man, but black women fall short by starting arguments early in the morning, late at night, lololol. BECAUSE THEY ARE NUTTS. I am not saying they make people hit them, but DANG, there is a limit to running one's mouth. Just like talking to anyone and bothering them and bothering them, something has to give. Many of us like me, I just leave or stop talking, because a sister knows she has the power. Sisters can lie, set you up to hit her and there you are, in jail .

by   
Jazflutesmith
October 2, 2009, 11:26 am
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jazz, I know that you enjoy being controversial, but that comment borders on being ignorant! How say you actually believe that the MAJORITY of Black people are prone to violent tendencies and behaviors?? I do agree that something is seriously wrong within our community, but something is wrong with our society as a whole...

by   
Brightwood1
October 2, 2009, 11:23 am
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Stop placing many of these black women as though they were on the right hand of G-d ,, God's hand would probably fall off, please. This whooooole article needs to be re-written, it is TOOOOOO ONE-SIDED. The title should be BLACK PEOPLE AS A GROUP ARE TOO VIOLENT..iamout
smithmusic_2000@yahoo.com

by   
Jazflutesmith
October 2, 2009, 11:18 am
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Real PEOPLE DON"T hit people.
YOU need to SPANK your children before they spank you.
Don't think black women are not violent, many of them are and they are nutts, crazy, love to hit and be hit. STAY AWAY FROM THESE PEOPLE THEY ARE GHETTO. THEY GO FROM ZERO TO HIGH ORDER VIOLENCE IN A MINUTE. SOME BLACK WOMEN OUT HERE ARE AS JUST NUTTS AS THE MEN.

by   
Jazflutesmith
October 2, 2009, 11:15 am
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

. I recently commented on the way black parents in Newark or Trenton , cannot remember the city; did not feed their children on the weekends. Some private program was put in place so chidren would have back-packs to take food home for the school site. Lord help us, schools have to feed them on the weekends now. You look at their BRAND NEW vehicles they drive dropping their children off in the mornings. The new vehilce cost how much a month ????? WHAT IS WRONG WITH US???

by   
Jazflutesmith
October 2, 2009, 11:09 am
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Black people as a group are kind of violent. Look at the crisis in Chicago with the death of soo many school age children. Dialectic is being very precise with his opinion(fact). I believe a majority of black people love violence, getting over, getting something for nothing. hurting people. There is something very seriously wrong with alot of black people, for ex; the way they raise their children. DANG

by   
Jazflutesmith
October 2, 2009, 11:05 am
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Real men don't hit women.
Real men provide for and protect women.
Some women think that a bad man is better than no man. A real woman does not think like that and would not tolerate being hit upside the head.
A lot of men don't know how to be men.
A lot of men don't know how to be fathers.
A lot of men don't know how to handle the pressures of manhood. This is why we need good brothers to step up and mentor younger brothers.
It is not good for kids to see " Daddy" or "Uncle" beating up Mommy on a regular basis..................

by   
BigBlackW
October 2, 2009, 11:01 am
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It's all about women having the self-esteem to know that they deserve better. Parents need to teach their daughters that from a young age.

by   
CAmira
October 2, 2009, 9:54 am
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I dated a guy once who joked, "I should slap you." I calmly told him that if he ever laid a hand on me, he better kill me or he was likely to die in his sleep. You don't need a gun to take a person out--one knock upside the head with my 25 pound cast iron dumbbell would suffice. And I was serious. He knew it, and never "joked" like that again. Although I feel for women who get beat, I also believe that men beat women who ALLOW them to beat them.

by   
CAmira
October 2, 2009, 9:52 am
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------